Reclaiming Imagination

This summer bloomed with a wealth of new worlds within our home. Imagination flourishes with each game played, baby doll rocked, lava river avoided, and play-dough café opened. My older daughter guides her little sister into elaborate scenes of brave rescues, fashion forward adventures, and every manner of cat-centric story. Their constant flow of chatter weaves between our world and another far more fanciful one.

Recently we left our story-layered home for a different sort of narrative immersion: the movie theatre! As we sat in the dim lights and watched Inside Out 2, I felt the weight of all that was happening in the world. I wanted to escape, to turn off my brain for a bit and relax, but somehow niggling fears for our family, city, country, and world kept creeping to the forefront of my mind.

After fishing out snacks, finding water bottles, and preventing a popcorn catastrophe, my attention was snagged by a line. “[Anxiety] is using her imagination against her!”

Oof.

My own mind has a propensity for doing exactly that: anxiety captures my imagination - once used for daring adventures and stuffie tea parties - and turns it into a fearful whirlwind of thoughts. What ifs spiral in my head, gaining speed and force.

I thought back to our morning, my wonder at the games my daughters invented, the beautiful worlds created, and the joy they experience in exercising in their imaginations. While I long for that playful, lovely relationship with my imagination, as someone who has struggled mightily with anxiety giving my imagination room to wander feels risky. My mind has not always treated blank space as a helpful practice.

My penchant to fill silence recently came to my attention while discussing audiobooks with some dear friends. They shared how they savor the quiet when they have the chance, not wanting to fill it with anything beyond the space to hear themselves think. I, on the other hand, have spent the past decade as an audiobook and podcast aficionado.

The question tugged at me for days: why was I so reticent to sit in silence? To simply let my mind wander? The answer is simply that I began this distraction technique when my anxiety posed a threat to down time. When left to its own devices, my imagination created terrible worst-case scenarios and spun on questions of “how would you handle this unthinkable occurrence?” My mind did not feel safe, so I drowned it out with other stories.

There is a strange sort of beauty to this practice. I know that when my anxiety creeps in, certain favorite books can draw me out of my own head, bringing me back to calmness by immersing me in a world far from my own. I believe at times we need to lean on others’ imaginations, resting in their stories, their worlds, to lighten the load of our own. When my mind limps with the weight of supporting my anxious thoughts, finding a beautiful story feels like the author slipping their arm under my own and pulling me up. They remind me of the whimsy, joy, and wonder that exist in my world.

This would usually be the point in the essay where I told you that the most comforting of stories are found in scripture. However, I’ve made it a point not to lie to you, dear readers. I love fiction and fantasy and have had to train myself to appreciate and find solace in scripture.

Having been in school studying theology for the past 7 years, reading scripture frequently fell into the category of stressful or work. While I wanted to feel the same excitement and wonder over the stories within scripture that I did with the stack of novels resting on my nightstand, I felt my interest and energy flagging when I cracked open the Bible. Then, a kind professor introduced me to the practice of Imaginative Prayer.

Also called Imaginative Contemplation, this practice incorporates wonder and creativity into our reading of scripture passages. Based in Ignatian spirituality, it uses prayer to enter into a gospel narrative and encounter Jesus. By immersing yourself in the story through sensory observations, you notice different elements of the narrative and can alter your perspective from an outsider to an insider. This opens new possibilities for what you can draw from the story and what you can learn about God.[1]

Reading scripture with openness and curiosity through Imaginative Contemplation allows me to learn from familiar gospel stories with a fresh, invigorated perspective. This practice engages my imagination creatively and forces me to flex those muscles of my mind that can become stuck in a rut of worst case scenarios. Leaning on the stories of scripture from another perspective not only inspires but frequently brings me to my knees in how awash I feel in God’s love.

Through this practice, I discovered a deep love for the forgotten tales of women in scripture. Imaginative Contemplation provides me with the tools to reexamine texts in the Old Testament that had formerly felt dry, clunky, or frankly disturbing. Entering the scene as Hagar, Jael, or Bathsheba, provides me with a sense of empathy for these women whose stories have been lost to us. And I mourn for those times when their stories have been retold without the imagination to consider their perspective.

My imagination is capable of more than planning for the worst-case, it is powerful, creative, and capable of noticing moments of wonder. Stories remind us of the strength of both our own and others’ imagination, inspiring us to consider another perspective or a shift in our opinion. My imagination may still be prone to wander into anxious patterns, but I am working daily to reclaim it. To gently guide it back to joy, to whimsy, and to the powerful stories we find in scripture, books, and in our own lives.

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[1] Traditionally, you read the passage once, then choose a character within the story or mentally insert yourself into the scene. When you read the passage again consider the sensory elements of the scene, what do you hear? Who do you see? How does the experience feel to you? Having grounded yourself in the senses of the passage, read the passage a third time considering what God might be telling you within this scene. Here is a great guide if you’d like to try!

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Recommendations

I recently had the chance to attend the Ignatian Creators Summit in Baltimore. It was an absolute delight to create alongside and get to know so many talented writers, actors, musicians, and visual artists! Big, bold, and beautiful things are happening over at Jesuit Media Lab and I encourage you to check it out.

A couple of friends who I had the pleasure of meeting or finally greeting in person have wonderful Substacks that I have savored reading:

Roll Credits with John Dougherty

engages deeply with stories of all kinds. I loved his take on Old Stories this past week!

Josh Noem

starts the conversation on great writing, wordcraft, and creativity in his Substack No Little Things. He collected a series of shorts on Why Baseball is Good for Your Soul which four of our fellow Summit members wrote and read aloud to us before an Orioles’ Game at Camden Yards. It was a delight to hear in person and wonderful to reflect back on in print.

One of my favorite authors,

Shannon K. Evans

, has a fabulous Substack called The Rewilded Life. But even more exciting is the fact that she has a new book coming out September 10th called ‘The Mystics Would Like a Word.’ You can now read the introduction and, if you pre-order, the first two chapters as well. I will be standing by the mailbox awaiting my copy, probably doing a happy dance when the mail carrier draws near.

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I’ll leave with a final note of self-promotion, I had the joy of writing a piece for Busted Halo on the movie Inside Out 2. Titled ‘Inside Out 2’ and the Journey of Self-Acceptance and Reconciliation, this essay felt extra special as it starred my two leading ladies!

Additionally, I had my prayer from last month’s Substack, Packed Tightly with Love, featured on Mothering Spirit. Its always a delight (and wildly humbling) to hear how folks use and pray with my words. I had a fellow mom reach out and tell me she prayed it as she dropped off her daughter at college. *Cue the tears on my part.

Thank you each for taking the time to read! Wishing you all a restful end of the summer and peaceful start of the school year! -Alli