Moving Forward Together

Barbie & Grandma

Author’s Note: This piece has absolutely nothing to do with theology. It’s finals season for me and I wasn’t able to write the piece I had intended. Instead, I am offering a little something wildly different than Women in the Old Testament: Barbie. I’ve been flexing my creative muscles a bit more and it shows in this piece; much more personally reflective than academic. I’d love your feedback on whether you would enjoy seeing more pieces of a similar tone in this space!

Many have hailed the Barbie movie as a triumph for women, feminism, and motherhood. As scores of pink clad movie goers descend on the theaters, greeting one another with jubilant cries of “Hi, Barbie!” you cannot help but feel the enthusiasm for such a female-centered film. Director Greta Gerwig paired fluorescent pink with deep reflections on the trials of womanhood, a costume wardrobe choked full of accessories with a critical examination of the patriarchy and feminism; in short, she combined the zany with the heartfelt in a surprising yet masterful way.

With that being said, I struggled with one of the more popular lines in the film: “we mothers stand still so that our daughters can look back and see how far they’ve come.” I can understand the line’s significance in promoting how mothers empower their daughters by granting them independence. This line speaks not only to the mother and daughter relationship, but also the complicated but central relationship between the doll Barbie and the children who play with her. Barbie provides an idea of greatness so that the children can see it as a possibility and achieve it.

However, as I sat in the dark theater, silently crying through Billie Eilish’s crooned melodies, I thought about the generations of women in my family and realized I didn’t want to look back to find them; I wanted them beside me. Why are mothers meant to stand still? For a movie that moved so deftly through various themes of feminism, this line fell flat for me. As a mother myself, I want my daughters to achieve all their dreams (currently my four-year-old aims for an Astronaut-Queen-Dino Expert); and I desire to lead them by example. I hope that my daughters look back and know that I cheered them on in every way, and that I pursued my own goals while I did so. As mothers, we too should dream.

Those dreams may move more slowly, they may adapt and change, they may spin around completely – but they should always remain important. As mothers we empower our daughters by letting go, by watching them soar, and by spreading our own wings and taking flight alongside them.

My grandma was my date to the Barbie movie. We laughed and cried and ate far too much popcorn together while enjoying the film; but I couldn’t shake the line about motherhood. On the drive home, I asked her what she thought about the idea of mothers standing still. She considered and replied that the world and feminism were different today than when she was growing up. While she certainly hadn’t stood still, her world was more limited when she was my age. She appreciated the range of opportunities open to her two daughters, her granddaughter (myself), and her two great granddaughters. She chuckled and informed me that before marrying my grandfather, she had looked him in the eyes and said “now, I’m a feminist and you should know that; I believe in equality.” She may not have realized it then, but she was moving us all forward; a generational leap that places us hand in hand rather than looking back.

Barbie truly shone as a joy-filled, reflective, and humorous film; I highly encourage you to see it. I just ask that when that particular line is spoken, you consider the ways we as women can move forward together - mothers, daughters, and granddaughters alike – because as the movie reminds us “that’s life. It’s all change.” So, let’s not stand still at any stage, let’s clasp hands and forge ahead together.

If you enjoyed this piece, would you consider sharing it with a friend or on social media?

Recommendations

My dear friend Mary Beth wrote a stunning piece on ‘Embracing Nature as Our Kin’ for Grotto Network. It’s lovely and leads into my next recommendation.

Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer has provided me such a beautiful education on the kinship model of creation and many other American Indian practices of respect and love for nature. The audiobook is read by the author herself and her voice pairs so well with her work.

If you’re craving a theology reflection I wrote a piece, entitled ‘Throw Me A Bone’, for Wisdom’s Dwelling where I muse on this past Sunday’s gospel reading, Matthew 15:21-28.

Lastly, I recently discovered the print magazine Taproot and cannot say enough good things about the content and quality of this publication. It focuses on “food, farm, family, and craft” and is meant to serve as “inspiration for people who are deepening their connections to their families, communities, and themselves as they strive to live locally and closer to the Earth.” A joy to read!

Thanks for being a part of this little corner of the internet and for reading my work. I would love to hear your thoughts and find out what you’re enjoying reading!